Why suicide?? Because I love your whole happily ever after thing

[SAY BYE BYE]

1) Some people don't get a "happily ever after" or a "make it up to you".

2) You are still permanently punished and banned from my family and
community for life. It's your godawful yuppie idea that you can make it all
up. You and I don't have the same assumptions, all of those years of your
inexcusable silence. I love your asshole privileged ideas of what "ails"
me....it shows we didn't start at the same place, so you need to divest
yourself of those false notions about yourself.

2) You can't make me happy. It's the asshole ignorant yuppie idea that you
can be "happy" that ticks me off in the first place. I realize that is
really unassimilated of me, and unpatriotic and unamerican.

3) I really believe to my core that you are acculturated or assimilated or
brainwashed. Your whole problem is that you are trying to be "happy". You
are always thinking of your "goals" in life.

4) I don't want to be around you, I am just too different from you
culturally. I don't have "goals" in life and wasn't raised to have them.
It's clear from the way you have behaved toward me that WE ARE NOT THE SAME.

5) I am convinced that you have a pathological inability to understand why I
am so disappointed with you.

6) By the way, my disappointment in you is no surprise to me. You are right
now exactly where I thought you would be. Go back to the sentimental bad
faith world you were nourished in.

7) I have no desire to be happy and that is not my goal.

8) We are angry at you because we have some fundamental cultural
differences. I am loving all of your "answers" by the way. That's great
that you are not an idiot and are sensitive and all!! That doesn't make you
more like me. It doesn't mean we have anything in common. You just didn't
get it done.

9) I never wanted you in my life. You think you are getting something done
and as far as my world is concerned, you aren't. It isn't even possible to
be who you are and get done what you think you are getting done.

10) You are a hurtful obstacle to me.

11) What a sunshiney positive all american guy you are. Why on earth would
someone not want to be happy. Did your education and head start teach you
why someone doesn't want to be happy. What a moron you look like that you
try SO hard and you can't figure that one out. Keep answering my questions.
It is sick and hurtful the way your life crashes into mine, you are not
welcome in it. I just hope you find some piss poor substitute of me to be
sorry to because I am not giving you a chance to be sorry to me. I am sick
of living with your "future". Learn that people are shaped by experience
not essence and how the fuck could we have anything in common. This is why
you are a thief and again you are really deaf to that.

12) Try studying philosophy and religion next time instead of being all
talented and cultural. You're still not smart enough to compete with me.
Thanks again for "learning" so you could be like me.

13) I have lost all hope for you learning. You keep trying to "learn" and
"improve" and you always have a "goal" always thinking about the "future"
and you seem really poorly educated that you think these things matter.

I DON'T WANT TO BE HAPPY AND I DON'T HAVE A GOAL. Stop buying me like it is
going to give you some encouragement, this is RAPE and exploitation. Again,
I have physically and emotionally hurt myself enough because of you, so has
my family, just take the fact that you started out cheating and incorrect
and get on with your life. I feel sorry for you. BYE.

14) I am sick of your "goals" in life and the way you fold me up like a dead
body into some story you tell yourself. This is arrogance. It is extremely
hurtful that you think you don't have to be sorry about anything.

15) What is really sad is how there is no hope for you. The only way you
can be like me is to get rid of me so you can take my place. You really
can't be me or learn what I have learned and I am sick of you trying to
displace me. What you are doing to me is a crime. What you are doing to my
family is a crime. It's the way you stick your nose in everything.

All the education in the world won't change the fact that there is a
fundamental flaw in the way you operate.

On a final and most important note, IT IS TRAGIC to see how you steal and
appropriate from me, all in the name of being a "friend" or helping......and
you have no idea that you are doing this or how to fix it. You are so blind
and dumb, you don't realize that this is the reason I don't live or work
with people like you, you are TRAGICALLY blind to your flaws and you have
them.

Trying really hard is not going to make you unflawed. Quit helping me,
trying to be my friend, or paying attention to me. YOU JUST DON'T
UNDERSTAND, that is no excuse to hurt me physically and emotionally then
broadcast from far away how "sorry" you are.

At least you can't make up for it, maybe you'll finally "learn" in the way I
think you should "learn". You do even more damage because I have to spend
years thinking why are you so ignorant and destructive and hurtful, and I
have to think about how you have to live with the guilt and the blind spots
for the rest of your life.

[SAY BYE BYE]

It's not your technology that sucks, it's your ego and over-confidence and
YOUR BAD FAITH.

As if you know what that is.

Go be "deep" with someone else. Tired of paying for the fact that you are
less interesting than me.

That is really tragic that you are too stupid and insensitive to realize
what you are destroying.

Again, this is the last time I am going to tell you that we didn't want YOU
in our lives twenty two or so years ago. How do you feel about THAT.

It's sad, you'll always be dangerously deaf and blind and ignorant. It's
not about laws or lawyers or anything material, you are just spiritually and
philosophically deprived and underdeveloped.

Please hurt one of your "own" next time. You taxed my family again so you
could go be sensitive some more. There really is no excuse for not taking
the time to make up your damage to me and my family like this.

Again I feel sorry for you. You create your obsesso situation because you
don't take time to learn what you are missing. You have to live with that
spiritual flaw.

As far as I am concerned, you are what you attract. Anyone with any real
world sense feels that way, you are at odds with the majority in the way you
don't take responsibility for what you attract.

Just reading you the rules that the rest of us have to live by. I think you
are too ignorant to fix your problem. When I say that I get "working hard"
and "educated" and "smart" and "clever" in response.

You're going to have to do better than that.

[SAY BYE BYE]

Look you, you have stripped me of all power and access.

I think you have the right to know how BAD and flawed you look around here,
but then again you never did think we were important. That is a major
weakness and character flaw on your purpose and what you think you are in
this world makes me want to stab myself in the heart.

[SAY BYE BYE]

I think you hurt and steal from me because you know I don't care.

You know that unlike you I don't thoughtlessly go on about my "wants" and
"needs" and goals and 'what I am all about'.

That is what violence does to people and stop lying to yourself, you didn't
go through that. This is why abusers like to hang out with the abused.
Excuse me mr and mrs caring are you an abuse victim?? No you are not, quit
trying to learn and care at our expense.

Keep trying to "learn" and self-improve as if god or wherever the fuck you
are going CARES.

I mean, anyone who matters can see that it's the way you're not sorry about
anything that betrays a major character flaw on your part. You don't even
seem to know how to fix your character flaw. You just don't seem to know
what to do with yourself or what you are doing in life. THEN DON'T DO IT.

Again, it is really, really, really insulting that you think I have to be
nice to a bunch of people who just aren't as developed as I am. I am sorry
this is so mean to you, but this is the very reason why you injured me in
the first place and probably the reason why being sorry to me is not a
priority.

I guess you haven't figured out why I am so hurt yet.....I lost all hope for
you a long time ago.

I think your ideas about life are dumb. The idea about you being around
people in need scares me.

You stole from me and were disrespectful and you are really unwittingly
arrogant, it is terrifying to me. We just aren't the same, I know that
isn't humble, which is why I paid for YOUR MISTAKES and selfishness AGAIN.

Also you are still ignorant about what hurts me and what makes me unwilling
to forgive you. As you can see, I am still seething about you with no one
to goad me about it.

I always will be angry at you, it's the way you take stuff for yourself and
think you are important when grinding the same damn people under your
wheels.

You'll never get in trouble for it either, you are a prostitute and a dupe
and you don't see yourself that way.

That you weren't sorry in time is not something you can fix. When you
aren't sorry in time it makes you a marked and hurtful person. Learn the
lessons about what you can do, I do not think you can.